The Planning Hiccups

Rancho Sol Del Pacifico

 

I know it's been a LONG time since I have written an update. I know, I know.

Here's the deal. I need advise!!!

Everything was going smoothly. More than smooth...we were on a roll getting things crossed off on the checklist.

Until....

Until some very close family members brought up some concerns about having the wedding at the ranch in Malibu. From the getgo, we always planned this to be OUR special day that the guests would share with us. But, WE were the driving force....not our guests. It was OUR special day that would always be remembered, and a day that the guests would likely forget over time....so we were planning it so it would be magical for us. Well, REALITY check.

For anyone planning a wedding at a non-traditional venue (not at a hotel), here are some things (some very REAL and legitimate things) that will inevitably come up:

• Where are kids going to be able to nap in between the wedding and the reception? 
• Where are people going to be able to change or freshen up in between the wedding and the reception?
• If it is a summer wedding, where will people freshen up after the bharat? 
  
• What is the radius of all of the events over the three to four days, and how will guests be getting there? It's fine if guests need to rent a car, but how far will they be driving in an unknown city. 
• How long does it take to get from one place to another? 

These are all things we thought about moderately, but none were big enough concerns for us. We thought the awe-factor with such majestic Malibu views would eliminate these issues from being big. Probably naive on our part, but that's what we thought. A majority of the people (friends, family) have advised us not to worry about it and to let the guests take care of themselves.

But over the weeks, this issue has just been nagging at us both so we went back to see what our option were. We called Amy, our wedding planner, who was wonderful through the whole process, to help us navigate options.

She came up with a BRILLIANT plan.....have the reception at a hotel closer to the sangeet venue...one that is close to the beach....and one that does indian weddings really well.....and of course, one that is in our budget. And for the wedding, pick a location that is right on the water (so I get my mandap overlooking the ocean on a bluff). This plan was perfect, and everyone would have been happy. In this plan the wedding would have been at Terranea (a gorgeous hotel in Rancho Palos Verdes, on a bluff, overlooking the ocean) and the reception would have been at the Hyatt Long Beach. It took Amy two weeks to get an answer from Terranea - and they said no. - they didn't want to host just the wedding, without a reception. Funny thing is, that the hotel, which is BRAND NEW, is going through bankruptcy (or close to it), yet they feel it is bad PR! Go figure! So, our wonderful plan is no longer an option.

Which puts us back a square 1. I would love to get some of the readers thinking on this one....I don't know what to do!

Here are the current facts (I am pointing out all the negatives to give a picture of what people have trouble over....obviously there are a lot of pros, which were explained in my blog post about the venue here). So, the issues....
1. More than 80% of our guests will be flying in from the Eastt coast or Midwest
2. The central hotel will be in Santa Monica
3. The Sangeet will be in Cerritos on Friday night  - - - a 45 min drive from Santa Monica
4. The wedding and reception is in the hills of Malibu on Sat - - - another 45 min drive from Santa Monica in the other direction
5. Given the distance, we are going to have the wedding and the reception in close timing so that people would not be bored. But this means they cannot go change in between, unless we try to get some rooms in this the private estate house, which is questionable.

Here are the things running around my head:
1. We have already put down a hefty deposit for the Malibu ranch, and there is a chance that we might not get it back
2. I want my guests to be happy and stress free, but I need to balance that with what we wanted from our wedding ..... mandap overlooking the ocean, nature, art.....all of that. I can't sacrifice that, RIGHT?
3. I can't blow up my budget and have the entire thing be at Terranea. That, unfortunately, can't happen.
4. We were done with the venue searches....the box was checked.....and it feels exhausting to even think that we have to go looking for something all over again. We tried one option, gave it a damn good effort, and it didn't work out....do we keep looking? And at what point do we tell our concerned family members, that we tried our best but that we couldn't find a reasonable solution? And if so, how do we work out their concerns to the best of our ability? 

Or do we make out of state family guest comfort our #1 criteria and diminish focus on everything else (basically shift from having it be "our" day to throwing a really great party)

So, what do I do? I'm going nuts....and need advise!!!